I really, really try not to yell at my kids.
Believe me, I've tried it lots of times. But it honestly doesn't work. And by that I mean, it doesn't get my kids to listen to me more often or to respect what I'm saying. It might work for that second of shock, but in the long run it seems to make my kids actually act worse. I can see Jordyn totally shut out when I get loud or mad and as she gets older that scares me.
So I've tried to do it less.
But it gets really hard sometimes because it's such a release of my OWN frustration! It takes so much self control to not yell when I am literally at my wits end. Like today, Lexi was testing my nerves. She does NOT drop a topic - ever. She wanted a snack, but she hadn't eaten any of her lunch. So she was annoyingly persistent for almost an hour.
(And then I lost it and discovered yet another reason not to yell when I'm mad....)
I could not stand it anymore and started yelling at her, all the reasons why she could NOT have a snack.
And guess who stared at me.......soaked it all in.........and then quickly started copying me? Yep, little Peyton put one hand on her hip, one finger up in the air and started yelling at Lexi, right in her face!
That stopped me right in my tracks and I just said "oooooh no". And right then and there I reset my goal to not yell!
6 comments:
You got it Jay, keep restarting your goals. It is hard and you will loose it and then you say your sorry and start over again. Progress not perfect. Take it from a mom who knows!
your MOM
Sounds like my continual story. Hailey, my youngest will go up to my older daughters and yell at them also. It is soooooo hard to control your temper! I too, need to work really hard on this. Thanks for the reminder.
This is one of those ugly truths of motherhood. I wish they would just ignore my bad habits, but every single one of my bad habits are repeated in some way, by each of my kids. The flip side of it, is that you can see some of the good you are doing as well, when they repeat your kind acts and loving nature. I love what your mom wrote, we just have to keep restarting our goals. :) (Pey is adorable, no matter what she does!)
I am soooooo glad to hear others are struggling with my cosntant, everyday (sometimes ALL day) challenge! I pray constantly for MORE patience, yet everyday I continue to struggle. I have just accepted that this challenge will not go away, but that I have to just learn to control it and try HARDER when I fail!
thanks for sharing your short comings, so that I too can feel some comfort in having the same!!
Progress...that is my new goal :)
So true! Little copy catters. Luke copies everything poor little Jacob does more than me. I'm constantly telling Jacob not to yell, hit, etc. because they are like little sponges. I thought I was a patient person until I had kids. I never even yelled at anyone before I had kids, now I feel like yelling multiple times a day. You are really good and patient with your kids. I have watched in awe on several occation at how you are so patient in explaining things and laying out the details.
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