Jordyn has been "sassy" since before she was 5 years old....and she's turning 7 next week...so for over two years. I mean, really really sassy. She's got a lot of attitude and it often wears me down.
So tonight she was on a sassy roll. I was trying to stay calm because if I've learned anything, it's that by staying calm I don't make it better, but, more importantly, I also don't make it worse. Sort of like "not adding fuel to the fire".
But staying calm is WAAAAYYYY easier said than done. With her eye rolling, and back talk and disrespectful comments....ugh. Anyway, I usually make her "do it again". Hoping she'll eventually learn to self-correct. And often she'll need to go to her room to remove herself from....well, mostly ME!. Or I'll make her write sentences. Or get a priviledge taken away. I've tried it all....card pulling, reward system, stickers, quarter jars...you name it.
Anyway, the one thing I've never done is soap in the mouth. But tonight, that changed.
I was SOOOO mad after a few hours that all I wanted to resort to was slap her mouth in frustration. But I knew that would be selfishly relieving my anger. So I took a deep breath and gave her the option: Mommy can either pop your mouth or wash it out with soap.
She looked at me really shocked. And then she surprised me. She chose the soap.
That made me nervous because I'd never done it. But now I had to. So we marched in the bathroom and I rubbed a bit of liquid soap on her tongue. Not a lot, but enough to get my point across. I explained to her that this was to wash the sassy and rude comments down the drain. It was actually a pretty calm experience.
And I have to say, the rest of the night was smoother. She really can be a great daughter, sister and helper when she wants to be. It was like it shocked her out of the mode she was in (which I'm learning, can be caused by about a gazillion things....). I don't plan to make it a habit. But you have to have a few secret "weapons" to pull out as a mom!
Lexi did NOT like that I did this. Later, she pulled me aside and said "Mom, if you ever give me the choice....I'd pick a pop on the mouth". I chuckled a little, because she'd really been contemplating this. I explained to her that as long as she doesn't talk mean or sassy, she won't ever have her mouth washed out with soap. And she probably won't because, for whatever reason, she doesn't (yet) have a single issue in that area. Thank heavens.
7 comments:
That's pretty funny! I would have chosen a pop in the mouth as well!!!
That is too funny, I to have a sassy one, and that's all you want to do is pop them. Well handled, whatever get's your point across. Good luck (to us all)!
Way to stay calm! That's probably the most challenge for me, too. I would love to fight back but I have to remind myself that I am supposed to be the mature parent. Ashlyn has definitely become better this past year, but she still will have her moments.
I love the idea with the soap. My Dad would do that to us when we talked rudely to my Mom. I also learned that President Hinckley's mom gave him soap when he spoke inappropriately.
I have to admit I did that to Jacob over a year ago. I gave it to him as a threat, but he gave me no choice and I have to follow through. I too used the liquid soap. It made a huge impression. I always felt a tinge of guilt until I heard the President Hinkley story. I would do it again if I have to, and I just might. To say that motherhood is a test of patience is an understatment.
I got the soap in the mouth once...ONCE! That was all I needed, good luck.
I am starting to think it's either the year or the month.... Jake and her sound more alike every day.
Oh boy... I have had to use cayenne.
I have used soap too (and hot sauce once) with Kaipo, who has a potty mouth. But I just can't do it again, because he has the most sensitive gage reflux that he threw up and I felt HORRIBLE after. Unfortunately, it didn't really fix the problem, so I am still trying differnet things with him. I think girls are way more affected by those kinds of things than boys. I could totally see Ame never doing it again, with even one soap squirt!
Post a Comment