Lately, Jordyn and Lexi have been REALLY into being "older'. For example, Jordyn wears my dressy shoes around the house so she can hear them "click" on the tile, like a grown-up. Or they pretend to talk like grown-ups (mimicking teachers, or me). They also are very intrigued by the romance in High School Musical and like to try to act like Gabriella. They constantly ask me detailed questions wondering "why does Troy like Gabriella" like he does.Another issue that I'm officially letting go of (let it be heard as an official declaration) is the clothing issue. I am so sick and tired of fighting about clothing. Even after I *thought* I let go of most of it, we still argue about it constantly. It ranges from Lexi only wanting to wear "blue" pants (aka jeans) to Jordyn hating how every single item feels on her body. It's either too long, too loose, too itchy.....I'd have to dress her in a cloud for her to not complain. But MOST of all, they both want to wear short sleeves and skirts/shorts ONLY. Lexi does a pretty good job coordinating outfits, but Jordyn goes for comfort over fasion and often puts together.....ummmm....interesting outfits.
I am really trying (really) to get over not caring how they look. Or if they are "wasting" perfectly good clothing that I think is cute by not wearing them before they grow out of them. We've tried setting clothes out the night before. This does one of two things (occasionally it works)....either 1) the fight still happens, just at night rather than in the morning or 2) they SAY they'll wear the outfit set out, but in the morning there are tears about it and lots of refusal. We're even tried days, like "mommy gets MWF and Jordyn gets Tues/TH".
I'm really only skimming the surface of this issue. I think I have lost years off my life with the battles. Tucker agrees....it is completely draining.
So here are my two main rules. I will really really really try to let go of the rest (it's so hard).
1) You can't wear the same piece of clothing twice in one week
2) You can't dig something out of the dirty clothes
And that is IT. I don't care if they freeze in their tank tops on a 50 degree day (cold for us), or if their clothing goes to "waste" (how I feel), or even if they look ridiculous.
I'm also trying to phrase my feelings more accurately. For example, sometimes I get frustrated and end up saying something like "Fine. Wear whatever you want. I really don't care" (insert frustrated tone). A few Sundays ago, I said that to Lexi. She looked at me sort of confused, adn then went and put on whatever she wanted (knowing it wasn't my choice). Later that day, she told Lindy "My mom said I can wear whatever I want today and that she didn't care".
But I've realized that is confusing and manipulative. So I've since tried to phrase it better. Last Sunday I said "Lexi, that is not the dress that Mommy wants you to wear. I've told you how I feel about it. But I'm letting you make your own choice today".
I'm sure someday I'll read this, and roll my eyes and say "I can't believe I thought that was such a trial!". But when it is an issue EVERY single day and actually makes us late for school way too often and makes our mornings feel so dang stressful.....it does feel like an issue.
Wish me luck in not caring!
7 comments:
My "fight" in the morning is. " how many degrees is it going to be today". Seriously what difference does that make. I tell Aly to go outside and to stand there and decide for herself if she is going to be cold her not. There are mornings she would where a bathing suit while it is snowing. I think her a Lexi are separate Siamese Twins sometimes. You should see the pic on my blog of what she wore to church on Sunday. I have to laugh now cause really I can't change what goes on in her brain and if I did it would be WW3 in the mornings. It is hard though cause sometimes she even wants to SLEEP in her clothes for the next day and then we wake up to snow and she still wants to wear it. I then tell her. If you are cold, I don't want to hear it. She wore her hair in the SAME ponytails 3 days in a row last week! and to "fix" it she just put a headband on. Oh my that was interesting. LOL I have to say to myself that if she doesn't care then why should I. She wanted to wear a pajama top to school that looked like lingerie. I told her that her clothes have to have sleeves and cover her knees. :) So now it is a rhyme I tell her in the summertime then I tell her the choice it ultimately up to her. Then it is really fun to have her have um lets say different rules at the "other" house. Good times. Crazy to have two EXTREMES with Jo and Lex. It will be interesting to see what Pey does.
I just take the clothes out of Savannahs' ward robe that I don't want her to wear. Plain and simple they disappear and "who Knows" what happened to them when she asks for them.
Katie's idea is a good one.
I need to feel very blessed that Ame and I don't butt head very often on the apparel issue. We do have our disagreements, but she must not be that picky. If it is cute and girly she seems happy.
Good luck on TRYING to not let this issue, right in front of you, bother you to death!!!
It is interesting that they are not influenced much by each other and seem to have very different feelings about clothes.
Ahh this is just starting in our household. Lauren has pink princess syndrome and wants to wear only pink outfits and watch out if things don't match perfectly. It's starting to be frustrating when even her pj's have to be completely pink and must absolutely match. It's a little frustrating because it can be so impractical. She wanted to wear pink princess slippers to preschool and high heels to the grocery store. I'm hoping that this doesn't last too long and if it does that I have the patience!!
I've decided aren't hose the cutest kids anyway? You know, the ones that look like they obviously picked out their own clothes that day and are prancing around like they own the place and feel good about themselves for picking out such a brilliant outfit. My kids do this ALOT. I've decided most of the time it "is what it is". Sigh...just wait until they are dressing in all black and shaving half of their head........sigh. There could be worse things than their choice of clothing right?
haha, you know how aweful I am about letting Jade walk out the door looking "artsy". Bill will usually bring it to my attention when she wears something REALLY aweful, and then I do what katie does, I take it out of her options pile. Now she is going to wear uniforms, and SHE is actually excited about not having to deal with making those choices in the morning. funny, you would have thought someone so creative would be sad to find their fashion expression stifled. Maybe some of the battles stem from the girls being overwhelmed by choices, and only their favorite things are comfortable (in the emotional sense). I don't know, it might just be that they want to wear the same thing over and over? I'm sure they flip when they get new clothes, but deep down, there might be something more than being stubborn, they really just find comfort and security in certain items, as inapropriate for the weather as they may be? Just a thought, since I had this revelation with Jade recently. :)
I feel like I just typed that whole post! That pretty much sums up Jake! I also decided that I cannot care anymore. I feel like i have to warn everyone he will be the one making the clothing choices... But who really cares, he is clean, fed, and rested. He also started a new fun thing... He will not let me cut his hair, he wants to have long cool hair... I guess to match "his outfit choices?!"AMEN SISTA!"
Post a Comment