I Stand Corrected!

For 9 1/2 years....ever since I met Tucker......I've made claims that "he isn't what you'd call a handy man" (actually, he is the first to admit it). Over the years, there have often been times I've wished he wanted to run to Home Depot and build something on a whim of mine.

Deep down, I wondered if there was SOMETHING there he could tap into. Some hidden talent. I mean, his dad built in their basement for heaven's sake! Didn't he inherit or absorb ANY of that? I have wondered.

And now I can safely say that I stand corrected! Deep down, there is a tiny bit of a handy man inside Tucker! And now he can no longer deny it. Check out what he did in the laundry room. It may not look like a huge deal, but to us it feels like he added on a room to the house! We keep walking in to stare at it! He built it perfectly, and I painted it to make it look like part of the house.

I've also learned a lesson. Sometimes things like the laundry room shelf full of crap (with a capital "C") falling down.....are actually blessings in disguise. Because now, instead of closing the door and avoiding the laundry, I actually WANT to do laundry in this clean, organized space!

Here are the before and afters:

Weekend in Review

Finding the perfect balance of fun and productiveness on weekends is difficult for me. Its gotta be just right. Or maybe tilted just a bit more toward the productive side. Because to me that IS fun (man, that makes me sound boring).

This weekend had a good balance and I felt extra happy about it since Tucker will be gone this upcoming weekend for Woodbadge Training (for scouts).

Let's see.....we had a couple family bike-rides, worked on the project of the 'disaster laundry room' (pics to come), cleaned the house, watched the Utes on T.V., Tucker and I went on a date, went to church with a linger-longer and a baptism afterward (long day!), played with cousins, I did some couponing with Lindy, bought a new vacuum, made cookies, and really just enjoyed time as a family! Gotta love these three-day weekends, huh?

Me....thinking we're posing for a cute self-portrait. Tucker.....being Tucker!

I got a good laugh out of it too.

Thanks for the fun date night!

What a beautiful day! And a beautiful girl!

Pey....lookin' a little ghost-like in the sun!

Since Jordyn is doing so well on her two wheel bike, we can enjoy some family bike rides. Although we have to go REALLY slow....this is me thinking "you guys coming?"

"Sure, after I get the splinter out of my foot!" cries Jordyn.

OK, all better. Lexi hopped off her bike and decided to take it easy in the trailer.

What a handsome bike-riding husband, huh?

I'm trying to include pictures of me, even if I hate them. Here you go.

The girls helped me make cookies. Although, in this picture, Lexi had to just watch and could not help since she decided to shove a bunch of Hershey Kisses in her mouth and then hide...even after I asked her not to eat anymore. She's going through a very sneaky phase right now! But, she still got to eat a cookie later, don't worry.

Family Friday - Ryan

I want to start something called "family friday" where I spotlight a member of my family. I will start today with my youngest sibling, my brother Ryan.

*******************

I am the oldest of five children and my (only) brother Ryan is the youngest. There are 14 years between us!

(my mom, pregnant with Ryan 1991)

I will never forget when my parents told us that my mom was pregnant with Ryan. I was the ripe old selfish age of 14, and I was admittedly a little disappointed. I hate to say that now, but I was! None of my friends had 5 kids in their family and it felt like my mom may as well be having her 100^th kid. My sadness didn’t last too long, however, and before I knew it I had my first and only brother and THAT was exciting! I’m pretty sure Ryan never got put down as a baby and I remember wanting to hold him forever and ever.

(Ryan, 22 months old)

In many ways, I was Ryan’s second mother. Being the oldest child, I was able to babysit and help a lot, and always felt motherly feelings toward my younger siblings (although they liked to put it as me being bossy!). I was always so proud of how cute he was and loved how much everyone doted over him. I was so proud, in fact, of my brother that that is precisely what my nickname for him was: “Brother”.

(Me and Ryan, 1997 at my cousin Michael's airport mission homecoming)

(Ryan (10), me, Tucker and Kristy (12) visiting Bear Lake with us in 2001)

I graduated from High School and moved away from home when Ryan was only 4 years old, so Ryan didn’t really know me as a sibling the first part of his life. I was more like an aunt to him. I’d see him when I’d come home to visit, but a 14 year gap equals completely different worlds. Ryan was always so quiet on the outside and I would try to relate to him, but I could tell that – even though he was quiet - his brain was observing and absorbing everything around him.

(Ryan in 2003 holding brand new baby Lexi)

Ryan is now 17 years old, and a senior in High School. He is also 6 feet tall and not so “little” anymore. Ryan is intelligent, insightful, funny and handsome. And it’s funny, but I still feel protective of him and motherly toward him. It has been fun to live near him over the past five years and to really get to know him. One of my favorite things is to see Ryan with my girls. He loves his nieces and nephew so much and you can tell they make his heart melt. Ryan LOVES to babysit them (with the exception of any dirty diapers) and, in fact, is Peyton’s permanent sitter while I take the older girls to piano! What a great uncle he is.

(Ryan and my Dad boating at Shaver Lake in 2003)

Ryan has been able to be in the scouting program with Tucker for the past few years, and Tucker has loved having Ryan along for the adventures of scuba diving, hiking, camping, and all the other crazy things they do. I love seeing my husband and brother have a relationship and to have fun together!

(Tucker and Ryan having a kool-aid toast New Year's Eve 2008)

(Tucker and Ryan with their scout troop on their trip to Zion's National Park, summer 2007)

There have been times in my life when I’ve had twinges of “it’s not fair” when I’ve seen some of the advantages Ryan has being the youngest that were not available to me as the oldest child. But I’ve come to understand that we all play an irreplaceable role in our family and no one is luckier than the other. Ryan has benefits of being the youngest that I may not have had, but he also has different challenges that I also didn’t have. For example, he has four older sisters and two brothers-in-law telling him what THEY think he should do all the time! I must say, he takes it “like a man” and loves us still the same.

(Ryan last week at the scout officer retreat on the speedtrack)

I hope Ryan knows how much my family and I love him and what an important role he plays in our lives! Thanks for being YOU, Ryan!

Speechless

Sadly, I didn't feel like I had anything worth auctioning for this amazing cause (although, I COULD auction off a basket of lots and lots of shampoo and conditioner!!! Heaven knows I have it in stock. Many brands. If you're interested...)

But I need to direct you to this link in the rare case you haven't seen it yourself yet! It is absolutely incredible! There are over 275 things being auctioned off, with all proceeds going to Nienie's family. I am just completely amazed by this. To see a list of the auctions, go HERE.

Want a peak into my brain?

Today we heard a loud crash in the house and so the kids and I went to investigate. To my dismay, I walked in the laundry room to see this. A shelf that was PACKED full of stuff (crap) plus TONS of clothes were hanging below....came crashing to the ground. After 4 1/2 years of doing its job, it decided it was done.

Are you kidding me? is all I can think. I've walked by this mess a few times since it happened, and I cannot bring myself to even pick up one single piece of it. I wish I could close my eyes and have it go away. It makes me feel tired and annoyed. And really, it represents how my brain feels right now! Cluttered, messy, and really tired!

Laugh of the Day

Today, Lexi was leaning on the couch next to me, telling me about her day at school. As we were talking, Peyton came up behind Lexi and was trying to pull down the back of her pants. I couldn't figure out why, so I said "Pey, what are you doing?" and she said "Lexi's poopy Mommy?", as she was digging to see.

Lexi's almost 5 and since there was no chance she was poopy, she and I had a really good laugh out of this one!

I don't think there is anything in the world that makes me happier than to see my girls play and love each other. Lexi is three years older than Peyton....which has been GREAT. They are close enough in age to still enjoy playing, but Lexi is just enough older to realize that Peyton is little and she doesn't engage in lots of fighting with her. I will usually hear "Moooooom, Peyton is pulling my hair!!!". Which is so much better than her just pulling Pey's hair back! That's more what I've always had with Jordyn and Lexi. Jordyn is only 19 months older than Lexi, and the age gap is much less apparent these days with those two. So it's sort of a level playing field with them!

This is Lexi indulging in Peyton's current favorite of "Motor boat, motor boat..."

Depression

For anyone who has ever struggled with depression in their own life, or via the life of a loved one....I stumbled across this post and found it insightful and real. Check it out: http://therinrins.typepad.com/our_little_life/2008/08/im-going-to-talk-about-depression.html

Whether circumstancial...or hormonal....or chemical......it's real, it's hard and it's like a silent taboo version of a cancer. I can't imagine a human being who hasn't been affected by this, one way or another.

(I hope she doesn't mind me - a stranger - linking this! She's a great writer. And the picture-evolution analogy is so cool)

Keys to Motherhood

Thanks to my friend Tricia for posting this on her blog today. I needed to read this more than she will ever know. I need to print this all over my house right now and read it over and over until it becomes part of my brain permanently.

Tricia attended Education Week at BYU, where she was able to hear a talk by author Daryl Hoole. I copied the highlights directly from Tricia's blog because I NEED this on my blog! (Thanks Tricia!)

It's Tune-Up Time by Daryl Hoole
~Be of Good Cheer - blessed is the home in which the mother is cheerful!
~Go to bed realizing what you DID do instead of what you DID NOT do!
~CHEERFUL mothers draw their children to them.
~THE IDEAL HOME - Managing a home involves much more than keeping a house clean, neat, organized and attractive. These skills are important, but they're the means to a greater end. The paramount objective is to create a setting where family and friends are comfortable and happy, where there are good dinners and good times, where there is fun and laughter, where children are taught life skills and how to be self reliant, where challenges are faced by coupling temporal affairs with eternal perspectives, where joy through gospel teaching and living prevails, where love is strong enough to bind the family forever, and where family members are nurtured toward eternal life.

Another Successful Night

So tonight was another couponing extravaganza for my sister and I! We went to three Walgreens and one Rite Aid. Here's the outcome:

Total Retail Value: $222
Total I Spent: $42
Total Savings: $180

Not bad! I think my dreams will be filled with the "beeping" of coupons because we heard SO many tonight!

A Feeling

(pic from http://blog.fotolia.com/us)

I can't remember the last time I was effected by something in the way that I have been from the moment I heard of Stephanie's (Nie) plane crash. I only 'know' this family through the 'blogosphere', but I check cjane's website multiple times per day for possible updates. This morning's post in particular brought many tears to my eyes. I am astounded at the amount of heartbreak I feel for the journey this family (especially the children) is preparing to endure, but also, at the same time, the amount of hope and upliftment (is that a word?) with which my heart has been filled. I have a constant prayer in my heart for miracles to happen for them.



A Funny

Well, this isn't all funny. But I found a peek of joy in it. Last night, I went to bed early. 11:00 is really early for me, and I was proud of myself. So, imagine my disappointment when my 22 month old started to cry at 1:15. This happens often, but it's usually a 2 minute thing. I could tell from the moment I heard it that it was going to be a long one (and I was right, she was wide awake for 2 1/2 hours). So after many attempts of snuggling in bed with mom, then going back to her bed, cry and repeat...she finally seemed content to stay in her bed, although wide awake. So I was laying in my bed frustrated, and all of the sudden she decides to sing. I hear "Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So!", and "Wing awoun Posies, Ashes Ashes, all pall down!"....over and over and over. And with such enthusiasm, I had to get up and see if one of her sisters was actually in there playing with her! Nope, just happy little Peyton! Finding "joy in the journey", right?



A Flashback Friday!

Oh my gosh, I was so excited yesterday! I found the blog of my friend Erica, whom I haven't been in touch with for nearly 10 years! I've wondered over and over how she is, but never knew how to find her! I don't know why it barely occurred to me, but I did a few searches for her blog (luckily I knew her married name!) and what do ya know? I found it! How fun it was to catch up with her and her four kids! Erica was a friend to me during a couple very formative years of my early adult life (probably 19-21) and she probably doesn't know it, but made a big impact on me! Erica, I'm so glad we can stay in touch now! Here are some funny pictures of 10+ years ago...Erica....I'm emailing you!

Too Cool at age 6 - What? *Updated*

(photo courtesy of austin360.com)

So this morning as Tucker was driving away with the girls at 7:40 am, they were smiling and waving with immense enthusiasm....and Peyton was crying. I felt sad for her....but also sad for me.

How is it that you can daydream about something for so many years, only to be so unprepared for it to actually happen?

Like any mother, I love and NEED breaks from my kids. But to have 2/3 of my children gone six hours every single day is such a big jump! And today I felt unexpectedly sad.

I wonder if it makes it harder, in some strange way, that they are SO excited about it all! Of course, I'd RATHER them be excited than crying and dreading school. But by them being so excited, it frees me up to feel that first step of letting my kids go into the big world. If they were scared or sad, I would put on my good-mom face of "you can do it!". But since they're not, I just get to simply adjust to the change.

Lexi was beaming from ear to ear when I picked her up. She was so proud and happy! She couldn't wait to see Jordyn and share with her in the world of "big school girls". So we went to pick up Jordyn.....me, Lexi, Lyric and Peyton were waiting under the tree when Lexi spotted Jordyn. She was so excited she said "Mom, can I yell for Jordyn?"

(here's where the story turns a bit sad)

And she proceeded to yell so loud and excitedly! As Jordyn drew nearer, Lexi couldn't resist....she started running as fast as she could toward Jordyn. She had her arms wide open, ready to give her a huge bear-hug! (this all felt like slow motion). Right as she was ready to fly into Jordyn with open arms, Jordyn turned abruptly away....obviously embarrassed and a little disgusted at Lexi's attempt.

And that's when my heart broke.

Lexi burst into the most gut-wrenching sobs, and was so obviously hurt by this rejection! I felt so sad and a little mad. I had to make so many split-second decisions on how to handle this! I couldn't completely be mad AT Jordyn for her feelings. I mean, she didn't pre-meditate them at all. And I didn't want Lexi to feel like a victim, but I wanted to soothe her sad heart. So I hugged her for a while, and calmly explained to Jordyn what had happened and why Lexi was so sad.

Given that my girls argue with each other 75% of their life, it's funny how effected I was by this. But it was different than the everyday offenses of who-has-who's-Barbie. I guess I just want my children to be protective of each other and certainly to never feel embarrassed of one another.

Boy, do I have a lot of prepping to do before I'm ready for Jr. High, huh?

*UPDATE*
So tonight we talked about the whole hug-rejection episode. And we concluded that Jordyn was perfectly fine giving Lexi hugs....just not at school. They agreed, and then practiced lots of running-up-and-hugging. Ahhh, that's more like it girls!

Back to School!

So today was the first day of 1st grade for Jordyn, and first partial day of kindergarten for Lexi!

Jordyn goes to school from 7:55-2:05
Lexi goes to school from 8:15-1:45
Me and Pey: Have lots of one-on-one time now!

Today was a great day! The girls were so excited! They could hardly eat breakfast due to excitement. Neither seemed very nervous! Even my self-proclaimed shy child, Lexi, did really well when she met her teacher and even said her name semi-audibly!

The only bad part of the day was when I locked my keys in my car, and had to walk around for 2 1/2 hours with two hungry and tired kids waiting for roadside assistance (where did they come from, San Diego?). Oh my gosh. That was frustrating. Other than that, the day was great!

This pic below is a fun comparison! If you look closely, you'll see Jordyn on the left on HER first day of Kindergarten just one year ago, and Lexi on the right TODAY. The funny part is that Lexi absolutely insisted that she wear this shirt and have her hair in braids....having no clue that Jordyn did the SAME thing on her first day of Kindergarten! Isn't that funny? She has some new shirts, but insisted on this one!

What cute sisters! Best friends forever!

Thanks a million, Lindy, for having Lexi and Pey during Kindergarten parent orientation!!!

Lexi and her good friend Maddie!

My little ham, Jordyn. Feeling like a big first grader!